I find Horrific Smelling Farts From Strangers offensive

Horrific Smelling Farts From Strangers
I DJ at a bar on the weekends. I don't know why, but apparently bars, and booze, and farts all go together. It never fails; every single weekend, somebody in that place ate rotten armadillo, and has the heinous smelling gas to prove it.

Not having my order taken first at a restaurant.
When I go out to eat with my boyfriend, I expect my order to be taken first. It's just good manners. Ladies first, and all. However, more often than not, they ask him first. To his credit, he always corrects the waitress by saying, "Take the lady's order first."

This money is just taking up space

Money!

As I think about this and look around, I find there are many useless things in my home. The most obvious is my checkbook. It's totally useless because there is no cash in the vault to back it up. A few other things are, the vacuum cleaner (completely useless, unless plugged in and actually USED.) The lava lamp I got for my birthday - it makes retarded looking lava lumps. Also, the majority of my clothes are useless ... they don't fit!

I can explain

Well, the sad truth is; while I certainly detest evasiveness, and indirect answers are quite unacceptable, I'm sure the explanation lies deep within the psyche of the deeply disturbed individual who is my alter ego. Said another way, essentially I'm not responsible - I'm nuts!

Is It Just Me ???

Or does anyone else feel the way I do about Adam Lambert?

In my humble opinion, his voice actually hurts my head. He screeches, and screams, and quite frankly, I find him insufferable.

Listen, I know right now he's the patron saint of gay men everywhere (move over Liza Minelli !) but gay or not, he's simply not the next American Idol! Furthermore, I find it to be just wrong for a professional to be a contestant on that show. I mean, isn't the whole idea to "discover unknown talen?" He's been performing professionally for some time - come on!

Most people I talk to really want to see Danny Gokey win. Yes, he has talent. Yes, he has a sad story. Yes, he looks to be a sincerely nice guy - BUT - I can't see him becoming a huge recording star either.

On the other hand ... this kid Allison Iraheta... wow! Amazing! Only 16 years old, and singing like a seasoned pro. Here's someone who can (and will) be a huge recording star. Granted, I'm not a fan of her genre, but shit - talent is talent.

Gooooooo Allison!

And what about poor Matt, and Lil? My money says they're both going home tonight.

And oh, by the way; Chris' performance of "She Works Hard For The Money" was absolutely genius last night. I was saying "Wow, I hear Carlos Santana," before Paula took the words right out of my mouth!